God’s Power: Alcoholics Anonymous Step #8

Step 8—

Made a list of all persons we had harmed,
and became willing to make amends
to them all.

In an online article written by John MacDougall, Making Amends in Your Steps to Recovery, he answers the question of: How do amends differ from apologies?

An amend has to do with restoring justice as much as possible. The idea is to restore in a direct way that which we have broken or damaged—or to make restoration in a symbolic way if we can't do it directly. Addiction creates moral wreckage. People who become addicted to alcohol or other drugs might lie, cheat, or steal in order to get and use their drug of choice. Often what's left behind is a trail of shattered relationships.

In this situation, apologies won't do. Alcoholics Anonymous calls for making amends instead. 

Amends are about a genuine change in our behavior instead of the patchwork of an apology.

---

Amends

Oh, the agony it causes me
When I think of the pain
Of the people I’ve hurt
Of the friendships I’ve strained.

But the burden is lifted
When I now make amends
And feel love again
With my family and friends.

I can’t change the past,
But the future’s brand new.
I want to be trusted,
I want to be true.

I’ve now made a list,
And I’m willing to face
All the people I’ve harmed
All the ones I’ve disgraced.

I’m not hiding any more
Behind guilt, lies, and shame.
I’m now making amends
And accepting the blame.

---

Yes. We must accept the blame. We must stop making excuses. We must stop rationalizing our behavior. We must make amends and restore justice. This is the only way we will find true peace.

(An excerpt from God’s Power—Embracing the 12 Steps)