Living Life: To set Goals…Or to not set goals?
Some people like to set goals. Some people do not.
I am somewhere in the middle. Some goals I just carry around in my head year after year saying, “Someday I want to….”
Other goals I specifically write down and hope to achieve them—without making a real plan of how to achieve them. Obviously, that doesn’t work either.
Benjamin Franklin is credited with saying: “If you fail to plan, you are planning to fail.” I love this quote and know how true it is from personal experience!
I also love the Zig Ziglar quote from his last book, Born to Win, which was written shortly before he died in 2012:“You were born to win, but to be a winner, you must plan to win, prepare to win, and expect to win.”
I’ve kept a long-time goal to graduate from College with a bachelor’s degree “someday.”
When I went to college, I didn’t set a specific goal to graduate. I went to college because my mother pushed me out of the nest with the words, “You need to go to college. You’ll have so many new experiences and have so much fun!”
I did have many new experiences. I did have a lot of fun. I also had many soul-stretching moments as I tried to figure out who I really was and what I was supposed to do with my life.
I also eventually started dating and then married the man of my dreams, David, during my second year of college. Yes, I was young—still just 19! After our first baby was born, I continued going to college while David and I took turns taking care of our sweet baby. I received my Associate of Arts degree at the same time David received his Bachelor of Science degree at Brigham Young University (BYU). Off we then went from Provo, Utah to Los Angeles, California, so he could get his MBA at the University of Southern California (USC). We decided to stay in California as David was offered his first job there.
Happily, our second baby was soon born! However, my desire for more education suddenly hit me, and I decided I wanted to go back to school to get my bachelor’s degree! I soon started college in the evening at California State University Northridge (CSUN) while David took care of our little children. I made it through two more semesters! Whew!
Then David received a church calling that required his service in the evenings, and he also had to start traveling for business. With my wonderful “babysitter” now unavailable, I decided to take a break from school and said to myself, “Someday I will graduate from college!”
While I still hadn’t yet graduated, those two semesters gave me the jumpstart I needed. I now knew what I wanted to do with my life! My first priority has always been to be a loving wife and a happy “stay-at-home” mom. By listening to my heart, I now understood I also had to develop some other gifts and talents the Lord had given me while I was at home with my beautiful family—a family that eventually grew into eleven independent, strong-willed, and loving children—seven daughters and four sons!
Besides being a wife and mother, I now knew I wanted to be a writer!
I wasn’t sure what I was supposed to write, but I tried to follow up on every spiritual impression that came to me. I started writing poems, songs, essays, musical presentations, books, self-help programs, research articles, business plans, website content, and eventually this blog. It’s been quite an amazing journey. I am content.
In my heart, I kept the long-time goal to graduate with a bachelor’s degree from college “someday.” So, about two years ago I requested my old school records from BYU and CSUN. I didn’t even know if they still existed! I was kindly told by the records department at each school that my records were in the “archives,” and it would take a few weeks to locate them. Finally, they were found! CSUN sent my records to BYU and BYU accepted all my credits! I then applied for and was accepted into the Bachelor of General Studies Program, which is a program that can be done either online or in person. This time I was ready to make a real plan to graduate!
Actually, I made three plans:
Plan A—Push really hard and graduate in one year.
Plan B—Slow down a bit and graduate when I’m 70.
Plan C—Slow down a lot and graduate when I’m 75.
Because I’m still in recovery from my accident on November 5, 2019 (see my 2020 post “Happy New Year???—My Fall”), I’ve decided to do Plan C. I am now okay with slowing down a lot!
Is it essential for everyone to set the goal to continue learning throughout their lives? Yes!
Any kind of education, training, or real-life experiences that help individuals to grow in knowledge and master new skills and talents will not only bless their own lives but also the lives of many other people within their circle of influence.
Autodidact
Some people are self-taught. I recently learned there is a formal word for this: Autodidact. The definition of Autodidact is: Auto- means "self" and "didact" comes from the Greek word for "teach," so an autodidact is a person who's self-taught.
My son Jonathan was self-taught, so I guess he can formally be called an autodidact! While Jonathan didn’t graduate from high school, he was always learning. He loved watching educational TV like the History Channel, and he followed all worldwide news and national politics. I learned a lot from him every time I was with him.
I am also an autodidact. When my formal education stopped, I continued to read every time I had a chance. When I learned about audio books, I was thrilled! The Internet allowed me to research every subject I’ve ever been interested in! I love to learn!
These are two of my favorite quotes about educating women:
“You educate a man; you educate a man. You educate a woman; you educate a generation.” — Brigham Young
"When you educate a girl, you start to affect her family, her community, her nation... that woman becomes a woman who understands the value of an education and educates her children." — Oprah Winfrey
Now, back to Goal Setting!
If you decide to set any goals sometime this year, please read the following excerpt from an article by Elaine Houston, B. S. called What is Goal Setting and How to Do it Well. I found it very helpful.
Commitment: Commitment refers to the degree to which an individual is attached to the goal and their determination to reach it – even when faced with obstacles.
Clarity: Specific goals put you on a direct course. When a goal is vague, it has limited motivational value.
Challenging: Goals must be challenging yet attainable.
Task Complexity: Overly complex goals that lie out of our skill level may become overwhelming and negatively impact morale, productivity, and motivation.
Feedback: Feedback, including internal feedback, helps to determine the degree to which a goal is being met and how you are progressing.
Understanding the importance of goals and the techniques involved in setting achievable goals paves the way for success. In the words of Pablo Picasso:“Our goals can only be reached through a vehicle of a plan, in which we must fervently believe, and upon which we must vigorously act.There is no other route to success.”
A few years ago, while pondering about setting a specific goal, this encouraging thought came to me, “A goal is not a cane to beat yourself with—it is a walking stick to help you climb the mountains in your life.”
Yes! Let’s not beat ourselves up for what we haven’t done. Let’s set a small goal and achieve it! Enjoy that sweet feeling of accomplishment for a few minutes and then set another small goal. Step by step we can climb all the mountains in our lives.