Women of Conviction: A Place of Belonging

In our church, we have a worldwide women’s organization called the Relief Society, which was established in 1842. Our motto is, “Charity Never Faileth” (1 Corinthians 13:8). In addition to teaching faith in Jesus Christ and being a service organization, the Relief Society is supposed to be a place of “belonging” for each woman eighteen years and older within our church. 

Recently I listened to a podcast and learned that while we are a family-oriented church, two-thirds of the women who belong to our church are single—from being widowed, divorced, or not yet married. While these “single sisters” often feel like they’re in the minority, they are actually in the majority! 

All people, both women and men, need to feel like they truly belong.

We all can be inclusive with other people as we reach out with kindness, caring, and real love to our friends, neighbors, co-workers, community organizations, church groups, and even strangers on the street. 

I hope you will listen to this 34-minute podcast and think about all the people you know in your life. We all need to ask ourselves this question: How can I help others feel that they are important, needed, and appreciated—that they truly have a safe place of belonging with me?

The following is the description of this podcast:

Tune in to this special episode to hear insights and personal experiences from President Jean B. Bingham, the current Relief Society general president. President Bingham shares experiences that have shaped her life, including infertility, parenting foster children, and gaining a global perspective as she worked and volunteered as a teacher with refugee and other vulnerable populations. She shares her desire that each woman, regardless of marital status, race, background, or other category know that they belong, are loved, and are needed in the Church. 

Belonging and Mattering

 My sister, Robin Litster Johnson, recently graduated from the University of Pennsylvania with a Master Degree in Applied Positive Psychology. As part of a school Service Learning Project, she and some of her classmates created a community enrichment program focused on “Developing Civility and Connection,” which included important research on “Belonging and Mattering.” 

This is my sister Robin on her graduation day from the University of Pennsylvania last year—at home—because of Covid-19. She chose to make it a very festive celebration!

Please read the excerpt below, which was written by my sister Robin Litster Johnson, and her classmates Hillary Chan, Elizabeth Fay Corcoran, Caitlin Satterfield, and Felix Yerace, to better understand these two important subjects.

The need to belong is a fundamental human need, motivating us to create and maintain lasting, positive, and significant interpersonal relationships (Baumeister & Leary, 1995). The need to belong has two main qualities: frequent personal interactions, and relationships marked by stability, concern, and continuation. Being accepted and included leads to positive emotions, while rejection leads to negative feelings (Baumeister & Leary, 1995). Inclusive belonging “promotes mutual support to the advantage of all” (Roffey, 2013, p. 41). Roffey (2013) defines communities as places where people have emotional connection, shared values, and interdependence. A sense of belonging predicts the extent to which a person finds their life meaningful (Lambert et al., 2013). Belonging to a community is associated with self-perceived health even when controlling for socioeconomic status, chronic disease, health behaviors, and stress (Ross, 2002). In addition, a sense of belonging in a community has been shown to be positively associated with social capital measures (Carpiano & Hystad, 2011).

“Mattering” consists of attention, importance, ego-extension, and dependence, and is a belief that others are interested in, concerned with, and dependent on us (Rosenberg & McCullough, 1981). Schlossberg (1989) added appreciation as an aspect of mattering. Mattering can also be thought of as the extent we make a difference to the world (Elliot, Kao, & Grant, 2004). In Elliot et al.’s (2004) context, mattering focuses on connections with others defined by two categories, awareness and relationships. Awareness is that we matter because people acknowledge that we exist. Relationships have two parts: importance and reliance. Importance is about being the object of someone’s interest or concern; reliance has to do with meeting needs or wants. Prilleltensky (2014) synthesized mattering as a continuum of recognition and impact and argued that “the struggle for mattering and thriving is what makes life worth living” (p. 151).

I hope you will click here take a few minutes to view Robin’s website, Robin Learning Systems. There is a wealth of information that will inspire you with new ideas as you continue your unique journey through life.